Fangs for Nothing – The Vampire Detective Book 1 by Laura Greenwood & Arizona Tape

Fangs for Nothing
The Vampire Detective Book 1
USA Today Bestselling Authors
Skye MacKinnon
Arizona Tape


When vampire, Lucy, is finally hired to do some proper private investigating, she uncovers a plot far deeper than she expected…and far more dangerous. If she doesn’t figure it out, vampires as a species could end up exposed. That’s if she doesn’t accidentally reveal them first.

And as if going on a date wasn’t stressful enough, Lucy’s Noble fiancé has made a reappearance, and he’s brought a rather distasteful present with him.

Fangs For Nothing is a paranormal reverse harem set in the Twin Souls Universe.

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This book opens with Lucy having a phone conversation with her sort of fiancé William Williamsbourgh III. The conversation appears to be routine for them, he asks if she’s coming home soon, followed by is she ready to marry him yet. Apparently he was a day late in asking and she’s still holding it against him almost a hundred years later. While that’s not a bad start to her day it’s about to go downhill. First her blood supply is the wrong type and she’s paying too much for that to happen, followed by a mysterious caller with a riddle, then a package is delivered out of nowhere. As she debates the possible contents she lists some of Williams gifts. I started giggling and really didn’t stop for a while. The package contained one very quick fur ball of black cat.

This is just one of many favorite scenes.

What was I supposed to do with his gift? Bring it inside? Leave it on the porch? Pretend I never got it?

All viable options…

“Meow,” the box exclaimed, rattling a little.

“What the fangs?” Carefully, I poked the cardboard, earning another meow. Was it a meowing head? A cat bomb?

Too curious for my own good, I crouched down and peeled the security tape away. A ball of fur jumped up and shot into the house like a black flash.

“For real?” Already exhausted with the situation, I shut the door and followed the cat inside. I didn’t want a pet, let alone a cat. I was perfectly fine without a hairy animal occupying my seat and ruining my sleep. If I wanted that, I could just take a husband. Those were just a little more favourable than cats.

“Here, kitty, kitty.” I rolled my eyes, looking under the couches and chairs for the little devilish fiend. “Come out, come out, so I can murder you.”

I shuffled through the house on hands and knees, trying to locate the intruder. There were just so many dark nooks and corners, it was impossible to find a black ball of fur.

If this was William’s idea of a good gift, he really didn’t know me at all.

Maybe I should just tell him that now instead of crawling around like an animal. Yes, that was a good idea.

Patiently, I let the rotary dial of my old-fashioned spin to combine the phone number that my “fiancé” had had for the last century.

“William Williamsbourgh speaking, how may I help you?”

“Why did you send me a cat?”

“And a good day to you too, Lucinda.”

“I hate cats, you know this.”

The deep voice chuckled, sending shivers down my spine. There was no denying he had an effect on me, even when he was pissing me off.

“I’m serious, William.”

“I didn’t send you anything…” Silence. “Apart from the telephone booth, but that one is still going through customs. I special ordered it.”

“I don’t need a telephone booth,” I sighed, slapping my forehead.

“Are you sure? Your mother told me you were using an old-fashioned device. I thought this was an upgrade.”

“You talked to my mother!?” I exclaimed.

“You know Georgina and I get together every month for bridge soirées. You know this. You should really come and join. It’s tradition.”

“Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people, William,” I groaned, wishing both him and my mother could just disappear for a day or two to give me some peace. Between the two of them, it was impossible to have a life. Which was one of the reasons I finally moved out of the family home and into Grandmother’s Manor.

Annoyed, I doodled little tornados on the notepad next to my phone. It was supposed to be for penning down serious inquiries, but I hadn’t really gotten many of those. Especially not with William hogging the line.

“So, you didn’t send me the cat?” I asked, wanting to clarify this matter. Someone delivered this feral thing to my door and I wanted to know who it was.

“No, I did not. Do you have another suitor I don’t know about?” he asked, his voice lowering even more.

“Unlikely,” I scoffed.

“What about your friend Derek?” he asked, sounding more amused than jealous.

“You know I don’t have time to date other people.”

“Does that imply you’re dating me?”

I chuckled. “Goodbye, William.”

“Always a pleasure.” Amused, I rolled my eyes even though he couldn’t see it. If he kept this up, I wouldn’t have it in me to keep shooting his marriage proposals back. It was good that I was a girl of principles or I’d long be Lucinda Corentine-Williamsbourgh, the third, I might add.

I retreated back to the living room, following the hissing sound of my newest companion. So if William hadn’t sent it, who had? And what was with the weird riddle from before? Four legs and no eyes?

It seemed ominous but that didn’t mean it couldn’t be fun. That was just in the eye of the beholder and as it were, my eye was made to spy.

With a grin, I grabbed my badge from the dresser and held it up. “PI Lucy is on the case.”
Tape, Arizona; Greenwood, Laura. Fangs For Nothing (The Vampire Detective Book 1). Kindle Locations (110-143). Twin Souls Publishing. Kindle Edition.

We meet her friend Derek, the one William had referred to as someone she might be dating. Then a friend of William’s shows up in the middle of the night wanting her help to find a watch.

It’s that case that is going to open up a whole can of worms and also has her working with a childhood friend Watson Xavier Smith.

There’s a lot going on in this book and it’s so much fun. I laughed out loud many times especially where William and either Derek or Watson were involved. Lucy is certainly in over her head.

It’s the ending of this book that had me immediately buying the next one. Oh my!

5 Contented Purrs for Arizona and Laura!

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Laura is a USA Today Bestselling Author of paranormal, fantasy, and contemporary romance. When she’s not writing, she can be found drinking ridiculous amounts of tea, trying to resist French Macaroons, and watching the Pitch Perfect trilogy for the hundredth time (at least!)

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A creator at heart, Ari has always been in love with the idea of turning nothing into something. She wants to conquer the book world with stories that focus on inclusivity and diversity, writing what she likes to read. Whether it’s adventure or romance, dragons and vampires, or princesses and students, there’s something for everyone.

Born in China, raised in Belgium, and currently living in the United Kingdom with her girlfriend, Ari is a citizen of the world and loves discovering new cultures. Luckily, her crazy imagination lets her discover places she’s never been to, meet people that don’t exist, and talk to readers from all over the world.

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